χθόνιος. a love nymph. flesh and fruit. daughter of venus. fruit of persephone. she. washed up on a shore, i met you in the belly of a whale. she. wreathed in aster and covered in sea foam and honey.
i wish i was always calm and put together, and even when im on a hedonistic ride i can’t get out of that mindset i always control my actions and how people see me, it drives me insane, even in my favourite nirvana, i cage myself and when i let go i hate myself, which leaves me confused about how i’m supposed to be?
“I had two longings and one was fighting the other. I wanted to be loved and I wanted to be always alone.” —Jean Rhys, Wide Sargasso Sea
“Alone. That’s the only way. [Alone]” — Virginia Woolf, The Complete Works of Virginia Woolf; Selected Diaries
“I? I walk alone;” —Sylvia Plath, Soliloquy of the Solipsist
“Now I know: I’m alone. I and my freedom that I don’t know how to use. Great responsibility of solitude. Whoever isn’t lost doesn’t know freedom and love it. As for me, I own up to my solitude that sometimes falls into ecstasy as before fireworks. I am alone and must live a certain intimate glory that in solitude can become pain. And the pain, silence.” —Clarice Lispector, Água Viva
“There are not two of us. Each of us is alone.” — Marguerite Duras, No More / C’est Tout
